Western education 2013

Sunday, July 28, 2013

...... my hair hurts.....

..... and is falling out with little persuasion.  The scalp is feeling tender and it started yesterday morning on day 19 of round 1.  It is hard to believe how fast the time is going and tomorrow will be round 2.  It's really not the hair that hurts as much as it is the head itself.  Tom once explained it to me that the hair sits within a gelatinous substance that when introduced to chemo, hardens, causing the hair to be less flexible and eventually breaks off... that's the uncomfortable part. I will rub my head multiple times through the day to remove as much of the hair as possible before it begins to feel like pins and needles in the scalp.

Yesterday our neighbors, who moved to Scarborough, came for a visit.  At the best of times, it is hard when people stare at you but when it is mixed with an awkward pitying stare... it is hard not to notice.  I know it comes partly from shock and mostly from a deep concern.  Their kids didn't seem to notice and did not ask about my thinning and extremely short hair.  Its the adults who know why and who react with emotions that are written all over their faces.  I was tired and made my way up to my room for a nap.  I needed a nap and good thing I did because Will called me at 2 am to have me come and pick him up.... Mitch came with me.  My boys are so opposite in nature but they are the best of friends and I know they will miss each other when Will goes to the military next month.

Max has begun the arduous task of cleaning out the basement and the garage of unnecessary items as he begins to claim some space for his artistic endeavors.  On his workbench is a poster he made when I was going through my first journey... the face staring back at me has been gone for 4 years.... my beautiful blonde hair, wrinkle free 45 year old face has changed with time and with chemo.  The chemo has quite a few side effects: dry skin, obvious hair loss, numb fingers and toes and a loss of toned skin around the face....almost as if the collagen has been compromised and a bowel that struggles to run efficiently but fails miserably.

The insurance company called me in the afternoon to discuss the claim with my car.... so the damage is estimated at $10,226.74!!!  Yes, it is significant amount of damage considering I was: A - not in my car at the time of the occurrence and B - it was in a parking lot where I was parked up to an island curb.  'Starsky' needs to be evaluated for his driving ability.  While they have the best guy for the job on it, it will take 17 days to repair it.  Both rocker panels were bowed and will need to be replaced??!!  Yes. it would seem that the man just kept on the gas peddle after ramming my car into the car behind me.....  I consider how darn lucky I was considering I had decided not to check my phone messages sitting in the car and instead went to my appointment a few minutes early.

At 5:30 this morning, I completed the last project due for my final module evaluation after noticing that I had not handed it in..... and I had forgotten all about it.  It wasn't my best work but it was pretty good considering everything else this week!!  That makes two professional courses done and soon after graduating with my teacher's certification.... I like being busy!!

I am dedicating this blog edition to my friend Christine, whose father has suffered multiple strokes recently, which has taken some of his faculties and functions from him.  I knew Art to be a strong and resilient man and who became a rock to me when I was a very young soldier in my military days.  He was a medic and I was a patient who needed to be escorted through a few medical emergencies in my stay up in an isolated military radar installation.  He brought me to his home, introduced me to his wife, who passed a few years later and his young daughter who was around 12 at the time.  Art, thank you for being my rock at a time when I needed someone the most... you advocated for me in some of my most desperate hours in actually 3 medical emergencies.... a severe allergic reaction to an insect bite, my fall where I impaled my hand on two keys and a trip to NDMC for my back.... I am sending you love and best wishes for a recovery.  Miracles can happen.

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