It has been a challenging season where I have pushed myself beyond what I ever imagined I could do. I have grown personally in leaps and bounds. Sunday was such an amazing day and a turning point in my life....
.... the summer had for me been a constant upheaval of drama within a group of strong women. I had never really worked with a large group of women before and within months, found that there were those that simply didn't like me for my 'new' ideas or my energy level. Some women simply hung out with their own group while others were just plain quiet, and there were those who couldn't care what anyone thought. Arrrrrrrg!!! How does one fit in when you feel like such an outsider? By the time I figured out where I belonged, it was about the time that I threw my hands in the air and gave up.... gave up trying to be everything to everyone. I stopped trying to like the miserable one, who could never, no matter what say anything nice. She spends most of her time complaining about everything to anyone who will listen and I simply went tone deaf in her presence. I could see her talking, but just couldn't hear her anymore. A friend of mine would say that she was an energy vampire sucking the life out of anyone within earshot.... and then she would do something really sweet.... sigh.
..... so why was Sunday so amazing? It was the day I realized that I loved each and every one of these incredibly amazing women with all their flaws and I accepted me for all of mine. It was the day I heard the words..'it's about time you were put on our boat' by the women who competed in the Women's division in their third race. It would be my third race as well, with the first two being in the BCS division. The fourth race i found myself back in the BCS boat with the ladies there welcoming back. I was so happy just being out and paddling in a boat and just doing my very best. WOW!!!! What an incredible day, filled with the camaraderie I had sought out my whole life and surprisingly finding that I just had to be myself and just enjoy the ride.... everything would fall into place just as the coach had predicted it would. I am such a lucky woman.
It is bittersweet bidding the season good bye but looking forward to another one starting in November when we begin another season of training in the gym. How did this fly by so quickly?
I dropped into work today to say hi to the fellows and to pick up some paperwork. I can't believe how small the new digital transmitter is.... I missed an entire rebuild and entry into the world of digital broadcasting. I got hugs from all the guys and sat and chatted with my boss. I am teaching at the college until my long term disability is over and then, we will see what comes next.... who knows, I will keep my fingers crossed that the next chapter goes well!!!
Two weeks ago I started my new ViSalus business and I am excited to watch it grow as I get healthier. It is my time to look into keeping myself healthy, build my stamina and keep the weight off. I promised myself that I would go into my 50's looking better than I did in my 30's... let's see if I can manage that goal over the next few years!!!
Here's to living life large!!
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